Sunday, March 2, 2014

Holy Wild Goose Chase! - "The Golden Parachute" Continues!

Here are Week 58 @Twitstery tweets of The Golden Parachute, the amazing new sequel to Executive Severance!

Dot flips through the ERUPT manual "'Due to overuse of support hot lines, We must limit free online support to the first 90 days of life.'"

"'Support after that carries a nominal charge. Added staff will cut wait time from the current 1-2 millennia to just a few hundred years.'"

"There you have the reason why this installment has taken so long." "Sure, Him and George R.R. Martin." Orville says "You're kidding right?"

"Do you honestly believe this is a sort of new New Testament?" "Do you honestly believe that He said all He has to say in just two volumes?"

Regi whispers "Ixnay on upsetting the ilotpay. He may be a religious undamentalistfay." "What?" "I can hear you two and I speak pig latin."

"I'd hate for you to go on a Geadh-Glas chase." "More pig latin?" "Celtic for wild goose. Means Holy Spirit." "Won't be the first time."

"Early Celtics called to the Holy Spirit "An Geadh-Glas"-wild goose-because it was thought wild not to be tracked nor tamed." "Just like me"

Regi snorts. "You are certainly some kind of goose." "I'm not saying this book is divinely inspired. I'm saying someone thinks THEY are."

Orville says "Say you're sorry or I'm turning this plane around." "I'm sure George R.R. Martin has great online support." "Not what I mean."

Dot says "This plane is my charter. We're not going back." "Fine. I need to land now anyway." "Fine. I need to plan my next move anyway."

The pilot chatters with the control tower as I make plans. First, deliver Willum Granger's earthly remains to Body Parts R Us for analysis. 

After what happened before, I don't trust the City Morgue. Second, track down the doppelGranger and make him squawk. Enough running around!

Enough being led around by a conman and a fraud! I don't care if he's a ghost, a clone or Granger back from the dead! I will hunt him down!

@Twitstery Good luck with that. You couldn't find your own ass with a pair of Google Glasses!

I've had it wandering around in the dark on this case! When I catch up with him...uh oh. I just got a direct message from "@HelloKitty1781."

RT @HelloKitty1781 Good luck with that. You couldn't find your own ass with a pair of Google Glasses! | Are you following me on Twitter?

HelloKitty1781! That's the name of the account Granger's murderer used to follow me on Twitter! He nearly put me in a permanent deep freeze!

How did Granger's doppelgänger get that account? What weird game is he playing? How can he be in two places at once, both dead and not dead?

I once wondered if he was a figment brought on by an undigested bit of beef, a crumb of cheese. Now he's reaching out to me through Twitter!

Tweeting, he lacks physical presence; he exists incorporeally. Could this entire case be a fantasy? It makes me question my own existence.

Regi asks "What are you tweeting?" "About whether I exist." My phone chimes "@Twitstery Of course you exist you idiot!" I show it to Regi.

"@HelloKitty1781? That's A's Twitter account." "Your father's doppelgänger got hold of it." "So he does exist!" "It's not proof either way."

(The Twitter Mystery continues daily at @Twitstery)

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